Do you ever wonder why you didn’t get the job or a promotion after an interview – or why a business phone call seemed to go so much better than an in-person meeting? When you are on a date or trying to convey a message to a friend, how do you ensure they are fully receiving your intentions correctly?

It may come down not just to what you say – but what is communicated beyond words. A unique book, Nonverbal Epiphany: Steps to Improve Your Nonverbal Communication by Dr. Stephen A. Furlich, provides well-researched answers to these questions and reveals the subtle nonverbal behaviors that often go unnoticed but contribute heavily to the impression one makes.

“The interconnectedness between biology and nonverbal communication is explored deeply here,” says Dr. Furlich, whose prior book was a best-seller, Sex Talk: How Biological Sex Influences Gender Communication Differences Throughout Life’s Stages.

Readers will learn how to better notice and understand other people’s nonverbal behaviors. They will also learn how to better communicate with their nonverbal behaviors. From teens to senior citizens, anyone can learn to improve their personal and professional nonverbal communication skills. Some areas covered are gestures, facial expressions, vocal changes, colors, and measurement proportions to mention a few areas.

Nonverbal Epiphany features chapters on gender communication differences, something he coins as communibiology, understanding emotions, identifying the powers of persuasion without words, the impact of using one’s voice artfully, how the colors and setting of your environment influence others, and how nonverbal miscommunications in healthcare can lead to wildly different outcomes.

Dr. Furlich has always been fascinated with communication behaviors that are less obvious. A vast amount of nonverbal communication research involves communication behaviors that are subtle. More effort is needed for a person to recognize these processes.

He explicitly expresses the benefit of applying academic research. It is not enough to only learn about nonverbal communication one must also develop nonverbal communication skills to communicate more effectively. This book helps readers develop these skills. They range from obvious nonverbal behaviors that most people know about to subtle behaviors that influence perceptions of other people. A more recent research interest for Dr. Furlich is the role of biology with communication. His perspective is that only focusing on social influences limits understanding.

“One's biology influences their nonverbal communication, and their nonverbal communication influences their biological reactions,” says Dr. Furlich. “Nonverbal Epiphany breaks down these dynamics for the reader to understand and apply during their own communication interactions. It also equips readers with a vast array of skills to use for more effective communication to achieve their personal and professional goals.”

Communicating Beyond Cultural Differences

When people from different cultural backgrounds communicate, there are risks for misunderstandings. People often have consistent ways of communicating and understanding others based on their cultural influences. A normal way for one person to communicate is likely not normal for someone from a different cultural background. A person's overall communication might be influenced by the interaction's level of context. Even communicating through technology is more effective when cultural factors are considered. These considerations should be thought about for both personal and business interactions.

Golden Ratio

Is there a secret formula in nonverbal communication that only a few people and God know about? If there is not one, then there sure are a lot of coincidences. The golden ratio has been identified throughout history, nature, human body, artworks, design, engineering and many other areas while going unnoticed by the majority of people

Some Observed Nonverbal Behaviors Are Revolutionary

Observe the common nonverbal behaviors people around you exhibit. The more common nonverbal behaviors are among people from different cultures and genders, the more likely they are evolutionary. These can include expressions, gestures, and eye behaviors, among others. Which ones do you notice, and why might they have been (important for survival and attracting mates? Try to make note of at least one common emotional display, gesture, and eye behavior that is consistent for a given situation, regardless of the cultural background for the people interacting.

Biological Influences On Communicating

Biology plays an important role in our nonverbal behaviors. While these biological interactions are instinctual and automatic, understanding them helps us better understand other people. Furthermore, there are things we can do to influence our biology and that of others in order to have more favorable nonverbal communication in our careers, potential relationships, or current relationships.

Gender Gap

Males and females differ nonverbally. Females understand others' nonverbal behaviors move accurately, which enables them to better empathize with others. Some biological sex differences help explain these nonverbal gender differences. Males and females (also differ in the nonverbal behaviors they display. These differences are observed with facial expressions and also with nonverbal body behaviors. It is important to understand the reasons for these nonverbal communication gender behavior differences. Failing to do so will lead to less effective communication.

What Face Are you Putting On?

How others perceive us and the messages we communicate often depend on our facial movements. People gather a great deal of information about others from their faces, such as emotions and personality traits. Repetitive facial expressions eventually leave clues behind about us on our faces. For all of these reasons and more, it behooves us to better understand what our own faces and other people's faces are communicating.

Shake Hands Like This

Here are a couple of suggestions about handshake interactions. When someone gives you a dominant handshake, use your opposite hand to slightly touch them on their arm or place your opposite hand on top of the hand shaking yours. Touching someone on the arm while shaking hands gives you the perception of being the more powerful person, while placing your hand on top of the other person's shaking hand gives you the literal upper hand. Also consider that having your palm facing upward leaves you more vulnerable to threats by exposing wrist veins that can lead to serious bleeding if cut. One way to prevent this is to stand so you must reach across your body to shake someone's hand, allowing your palm to face naturally down. Shaking hands with a person on your right side naturally has your palm facing upward.